Cain and Abel
by Quaxo
Summary: He always thought of himself as more of an Abel than a Cain. Frank reflects on growing up with Bobby.


Disclaimer: I own nothing, Dick Wolf owns everything. I had to write this because Frank as the older, yet shorter, sibling is something that was familiar to me (It's a real pain when your "little" brother is a foot taller than you).

Spoilers, I guess, for Brother's Keeper and Untethered if you squint, although if you haven't seen those episodes already then you probably weren't reading this fic anyway.

* * *

Cain and Abel, two brothers torn apart by jealousy: Cain the older brother who farmed the land and who's sacrifices displeased God, Abel the younger brother who gave the best and the fattest of his flock and was loved by God. He always thought of himself as more of an Abel than a Cain growing up. Sure he was the bigger brother…

Well, he hasn't been the 'bigger' brother since he was fourteen. That was the summer Bobby hit his first growth spurt, and suddenly people were asking if they were cousins. Mom had fretted about having to buy new clothes for the two of them, since Bobby couldn't wear his old clothes.

He'd hear Bobby at night, lying in the bunk below him, groaning in his sleep as his body kept growing, and growing and growing like a weed. Mom had been scared Bobby alone was going to eat them out of the house and had taken to padlocking the kitchen cabinets. Well, and because she thought the CIA was going to try to sneak in and poison the food…

By the next summer he was wearing Bobby's old clothes. Bobby even got facial hair before he did (and it grew in nicer too). People started assuming that Bobby was the oldest of the two, and while he couldn't blame them, it was still frustrating. He was the older one, he was the one who took care of Bobby when Mom was having one of her episodes, or Dad was drunk and itching for someone to punish for his loss at the track, or when they were left all alone.

Making Bobby mind had become another problem, since he'd lost most of his physical advantage over him. Bobby was still in that gangly phase, all height but no muscle, but even then it was a close call between the two of them. Bobby was always getting into trouble too, poking his nose where it didn't belong and opening his mouth when it should've stayed shut.

Fortunately "I'm older and smarter than you" worked at least half the time, especially if report cards had come out recently. Bobby might have been the bigger of the two of them, but he was the one with the brains: Straight As all through school, honor roll every semester. Bobby could barely manage Bs and Cs, which Mom always despaired of:

"_With all the books you read, Bobby, can't you read one that would improve your grades? What am I going to do with you?"_

Dad didn't care about Bobby's grades one way or another, his on the other hand:

"_Frank, you got to be smart. You're going to get stuck taking care of your brother someday because god knows he'll never pull his head out of his ass and focus. Always off in a daydream like your damn mother."_

So he had been smart, and worked hard. He'd been a National Honor Society member, and won the science fair with his experiment on the flammability of various types of fabric. That had gotten him a nice scholarship to attend Queens College. He was going places.

Bobby was a mess though. He'd hoped joining the basketball squad would have finally made him buckle down, but it hadn't lasted long. Bobby quit not even halfway through the season, much to the coach's (who was also his chemistry teacher) vocal disappointment:

"_You gotta talk to your brother, Frank. Next year I would have bumped him up to the varsity squad, he's so tall. Varsity squad means scholarships, and academic assistance. He could get into a college then, because his grades certainly aren't going to…"_

It was pointless though, because once Bobby made up his mind, he was as stubborn as a mule.

He'd tried to be the responsible older brother, and lectured Bobby on the importance of doing his homework, not cutting class, how to not getting a girl pregnant, getting a scholarship, going to a good college… all for nothing.

"_All work and no play makes Frankie a dull boy. You should come out with me and Lewis one night and cut loose. He's got a friend who can get him some beer and we can head out to the shore, whaddya say? There's supposed to be some college kids having a party there too…"_

He hadn't gone, but as luck would have it Bobby got in trouble anyways. Just like he always did. Some car ran into the car they were riding in, smashing straight into Bobby's door. Mom had nearly lost it at the hospital, although whether it was out of concern for Bobby (who just had a concussion and broken arm) or because she thought they were trying to institutionalize her again was anyone's guess.

Dad had been pissed, and laid into him as they waited Bobby to come back from radiology.

"_You should've been there, Frank, you shouldn't have let him go in the first place! You're his older brother, he's supposed to listen to you. This is all your fault!"_

It wasn't fair, he'd thought then, if Dad hadn't left he'd know how difficult it really was to be the older, better brother to Bobby. Bobby did what he wanted, damn the consequences. Bobby only listened to Mom, and she was pretty much worthless when it came to disciplining him.

He was the Abel because he wasn't the screw up; he was good at school, he kept out of trouble, took care of Mom and Bobby the best he could… He did what he was told.

Abel couldn't win though. Abel always dies at the hands of his brother…

When he went to college, he moved onto the dorms instead of trying to commute. He came home for the holidays, but only for a day or so, spending more of his time with his buddies, and now that he was old enough with his dad.

Dad taught him all his secrets too, passing them down, father to son. That's because he's the good brother, the one who's always listened and obeyed. Bobby had hated that, hated Dad… had told him that following Dad's footsteps was going to lead to nothing but trouble. Well, Bobby hadn't been wrong, but he'd still been jealous, because Dad wanted to spend time with him instead of Bobby.

Bobby might have the better job and the hotter girl, currently, but he was still jealous, just like he always has been.


End file.
